Trust in God

TRUST IN GOD

Above all, trust in the slow work of God.

We are, quite naturally, impatient in everything to reach the end without delay.

We should like to skip the intermediate stages.

We are impatient of being on the way to something unknown, something new.

And yet it is the law of all progress that it is made by passing through some stages of instability . . .

And that it may take a very long time.

And so I think it is with you.

Your ideas mature gradually; let them grow, let them shape themselves without undue haste.

Don’t try to force them on,
as though you could today (become) what time (that is, grace and circumstances acting on your own goodwill) will make tomorrow.

Only God could say what this new spirit gradually forming within you will be.

Give our Lord the benefit of your believing that his hand is leading you,
and of your accepting the anxiety of feeling yourself in suspense and incomplete.

Teilhard de Chardin

(Priest and paleontologist, written during WW11 where he chose to serve on the front as a stretcher bearer.)

The Cost of Non-Discipleship

A friend regularly comments to me that she is convinced that it's no harder to choose well, in lines with discipleship, than to choose in unhealthy ways; we just pay the cost in different ways and at different times.  Given this repeated conversation, I was struck by this great blog post.  The post speaks about someone's paraphrase of Dallas Willard in words that speak so strongly of what has been God's statement to me for some time now: “If you think it’s hard being a disciple of Christ, you should try living the other way.” 

One Thing Remains

On yet another long drive, I was listening to the song "One Thing Remains" this afternoon and reflecting on it as one of the key songs of the last year.  While many other things have changed, one thing remains: God's love.  It's been a precious year of having a deeper lived understanding of that as once again much else has changed.  I wouldn't trade that lived understanding and knowledge for the world.

Getting to the Core

How do you know the core of the message you are trying to communicate?

That's a question that I have been pondering in numerous guises over recent times.  As I ponder, I'm conscious that it feels hard to work out the core of what you are trying to communicate - it feels like it's often too hard in fact.

But I'm reinforced in the belief that it is important.

Ideas that stick according to Dan and Chip Heath are ones that are simple (though often profound): they get to the core and are compact.

So if the ideas that I'm wanting to communicate matter then I need to do the work to get to the core and communicate that core in a way that is compact.

Present or Future Self?

How many of us use commitment devices of some kind in order to help us choose the things we want to choose?  One such commitment device is stickK.

Here is a great TED talk that recognises the benefit of commitment devices but explores some alternative ways of helping behaviour change that involves imagining our future selves dependent on what choices we make today as our present selves.  Motivating and helps us understand at a deep level the connection between the choices we make today and the people we will be or what we will have in the future.

The Prodigal God - by Tim Keller

I recently read the book "The Prodigal God: Recovering the Heart of the Christian Faith" by Timothy Keller.  It was a great and easy read; though challenging to the core.

As you can probably guess, the book is based on the story of the two sons, often spoken of as The Prodigal Son story.  This story always helps me continue to grasp the Father's heart and who I am and the Father's embrace of me.  Over the last couple of years I've been in numerous situations where this story has been at the fore: considering Henri Nouwen's book last year in my faith community gathering and also having a print of the picture based on this story in my workplace last year.  The story has shaped me deeply over recent years.

This book refreshed much of that shaping - and shaped me afresh too.  A few points of Keller's book that stood out to me were: an emphasis on who the hearers of this story were (a mixed group of listeners); the emphasis on the eldest sons lostness as well as the lostness of the younger son; the fact that the story ends with us not knowing how the story really ends; the Father's initiative in coming out to both sons.  However, the thing that really struck me was Keller's exploration of Jesus as the "true elder brother" and the cost to the elder brother of the Father's welcoming home of the younger son.  This exploration has left me pondering - and thankful.

Formational Children's Ministry by Ivy Beckwith

Ivy Beckwith is one of the people writing about children's ministry currently whose ideas I most resonate with.  Having read this book over the last few days, I would highly recommend it to anyone who has a role with children.

The title "Formational Children's Ministry: shaping children using story, ritual and relationships"is a very good descriptor of the book.  The key idea of the book is the formation of children (as opposed to giving children knowledge).  In discussing this formation, the book discusses the importance of story (God's story, their story, our family story, the story of the church through the ages and the individual faith community story), the importance of ritual and the importance of different types of relationships.

There are some good practical examples about how to engage story, ritual and relationships in the formation of children and it's a book with a balanced understanding of the role of family and the role of the faith community in the formation of children.  Another thing that I thought that Ivy does really well is speak across a broad range of expressions of "church" - broad evangelical, liturgical and emerging.

Without spelling it out constantly, the book also has a solid understanding of the current context of today's children, families and churches.  One of my favourite quotes from the book embodies this understanding:
"The millennials and futuristic adaptives, the two generations we currently teach in our churches, are not primarily linear thinkers.  They do think logically and linearly, but it is not the only way they think, and it is not necessarily their preferred way of processing information.  Therefore, lessons that are heavily dependent on linear thinking are not going to capture them the same as lessons that include kinesthetic, intuitive, affective, and 'loopy' ways of processing information." (p28)

Parents, people involved in children's ministry, ministers, teachers, friends of kids - I highly recommend it!

The Amazing South of WA

A lovely couple of days.

On Tuesday morning, my friend Kylie and I left Perth and drove to Bremer Bay.  A very wet drive.  The initial purpose of this trip is for me to see the locations of the Family Missions that happen around WA over summer.  That meant that we went via Brookton in the wheatbelt - check out the sites that the mission use and got a sense of the town.  I'm increasingly conscious that there are things you just can't know without seeing a place for yourself - it's so valuable.  Then a late lunch at Stumpy's Roadhouse - we've said that "roadhouses are our friend"!  Then the long drive to Bremer Bay.

We stopped in Katanning for a quick walk and Kylie was impressed with the friendliness of the locals driving past in utes!  We spent some time trying to work out whether we needed to eat there - or whether we would make it to Bremer Bay in time for the restaurant at the place we were staying.  A phone call to the place we were staying indicated that they thought we would make it.  We followed there advice - and made it in plenty of time.  But it is a consideration that I am learning to regularly take into account in my WA life, even more so outside of Perth.

Bremer Bay Resort more than met our expectations.  After settling into our room, we went into the restaurant and ordered dinner - lamb shanks for me, lamb curry for Kylie; glass of white wine for Kylie, glass of red for me.  Very satisfying.  TV / Computer time / Sleep followed.

As we woke up on Wednesday and opened the blind, we were greeted by a clear morning and a view of the local river.  After packing the car, we headed up for breakfast at the restaurant - the best breakfast I have ever had! Eggs Florentine.

I chatted to a friend while we ate; Kylie read some of her book.  We then talked for a couple of hours while sitting in a lovely spot.

Eventually we got moving.  And checked out the beach in Bremer Bay.

As we drove around the town we came across a "Barbara St".  Of course, I needed to take a photo.  Kylie suggested that it was a sign ... a sign of what?  It would be a pretty good place to live!  We resisted taking the sign!

Once we were finished with the township we headed out to the caravan park out of town.  This is the place that the mission team stay at - and part of my purpose on this trip is to check out such places.  The owner and staff were friendly and clearly appreciative of the teams presence there in January.  They also proved to be our tourist information - and pointed us in the direction of beaches to check out before we left the area - and recommendations for our next few days as we continued around the coast.  Before we left the Bremer Bay area we headed down to Blossom Beach which the owner of the caravan park had recommended to us.

Next on our journey was Cheynes Beach.  A very small isolated place - where a mission team is over summer.  We connected with the caravan park owner - who once again was helpful.  And after checking out the location of where they run the program in January, we headed down to the beach.

We walked along the beach - wanting to have a closer look at a boat that was on the water.

We couldn't have chosen a better time to be on the beach.  Sunset - and such beauty.

And in the midst of that - a gorgeous photo opportunity.

As I look at that sunset - and reflect on what such beauty draws out of me, I'm reminded of the rainbows that we saw on the trip yesterday.  A few different occasions we saw rainbows - on an occasion we could see the whole of a rainbow, another time we could see part of a double rainbow - special and a reminder of God's faithfulness.  

Life is breathtaking.  We saw and experienced many moments of such life yesterday and arrived into Albany tired from both days of driving but satisfied and having had a relaxing and fun day of exploring - as well as great interactions with staff of the caravan parks missions are connected with and gaining an understanding of the context they are ministering in.

No question - it was a day of experiencing the wonder of God's awesome creation.

Impact of death

Death impacts us.

A week ago a friend of mine died.
Not someone I saw regularly.
But someone who was/is of importance to me.
Someone who is part of my history.

We have lived in separate places for most of our lives but our paths have crossed enough for connections to have continued.  We met as children on Groote Eylandt.  One of my clearest memories of her from that era was when I was 13 and was baptised and confirmed in October 1988.  That night I stayed at Angurugu at her families place.  At a lonely time in my life - she was a friend.

Some years later (1997), in what felt like another lifetime, I was at a national conference for an organisation that I was a volunteer with (and now work for) and there was Krysti, also heavily involved with this organisation.  That week established our connection as adults - and people who cared passionately about our faith and seeing young people connect with and find real the person of Jesus.  We also had some deep personal conversations around some of life history which also brought us closer.  There was also some late nights of fun!

About 5 years later, Krysti came to Melbourne (where I lived at the time) to study at Bible College.  Again connections continued.  Not frequent but several during her time in Melbourne - enough to continue the friendship and the sense of connection around a shared history and shared passions in the present.  And again a sense of fun.

Krysti returned to Darwin.  Facebook continued our connection.  And then in 2009 my uncle was seriously ill in Darwin - and Krysti once again was a friend, at a time when that is so what I needed.  As soon as she heard, she showed her care and arranged for me to stay with her parents.  She (and her family) had me over for dinner and we once again shared some significant moments of conversation - in the midst of one of the most stressful weeks of my life.  Her presence, her actions and our conversations continued to help me be grounded in the One who was her, and my, source of hope and peace.

And now she has died.  A journey of 18 months or so.  A husband and two children.  A life that has been well lived.  A life that has been lived with passion.  A strong sense by people close to her that she is now with the One she most loved.  Deep grief for many who knew her - especially those closest.

I've felt the distance this last week.
I'm in Perth; I wanted to be in Darwin.
I've been thankful that I've been working in an organisation where a few people know of her - and know of her death.  There is something about that connection that makes it easier.
I've been very conscious of those who are the closest people to her - having known something of deep grief myself, they have not been far from my thoughts and prayers this last week.
I've also been conscious of how death affects us - from whatever the point of our relationship to a person.  For each of us the story is different.  But its impact is profound - and not necessarily just for the closest.  For me this week, I've felt a sense of isolation and disconnection - as I grieve the passing from this life of a friend who has shared some significant moments and have no co-grievers around me.  There has been a deep sense of feeling for her family and those others closest to her.  Along with that, there has been a thankfulness for her life full of faith, hope and passion and once again grief has plunged me into living fully in the moment that I find myself and being fully myself - embracing faith, hope and passion in the place that I find myself.  Once again, I experience the journey of grief which embraces the "both/and" of such different emotions and thoughts and I find myself know something of the mysterious comfort of the "God of all comfort" and praying that those closest are also experiencing something of that comfort.

Centering Prayer

I so often find the things on Paul Fromont's blog helpful and interesting - and often points me in the direction of various resources, books and articles.  This is another post like that.

I loved this statement which is from Paul's notes in reflecting on Cynthia Bourgeault.  So true of my experience.


"Centering prayer “patterns us” over time. It reprogram’s us to “let go” and to be “open”. It wires new channels of perception that enable us “to see the lines connecting the dots”; to “extend hospitality and hold together what are typically held as opposites; one over and against another!"

SUNO blog

I am actually blogging a bit now - much more over on the SUNO blog connected with Scripture Union WA where I'm now working.  You might like to put that blog in your feed reader or look at it occasionally - however you read your blogs!  As I'm writing on that blog, I'm having all sorts of ideas that don't fit the scope of that blog - so I suspect that it will actually mean a decent amount more blogging on this blog too.  Loosely speaking - things to do with missional living or missional leadership style things will be on the SUNO blog, with other things on here.

Today is a New Day

This year I've been part of a gathering where we spend an hour each week doing 4 different spiritual exercises.  In our last 6 week cycle, journalling was one of these.  Here's a poem I wrote a few weeks ago:

Today is a new day
It's a brand new day
The breaking of the dawn
The coming of the new.

New adventures
New horizons
Life as we know it
Is left behind for good.

The future ahead
Possibilities abound
Trust is nurtured
And embraced.

It's anew day
New challenges
Life to be lived
Love to be loved.

Look forward
Not back
The world beckons
Respond with all of yourself.

Today is a new day
A day to be thankful for
Life to be lived
A day to live to the fullest.

Leave yesterday behind
It has shaped you
But there is no more to be done there
Today is the only day you can do anything about.

What is it that must be done today?
That is different from yesterday
And different from tomorrow.

What is the invitation for today?
Just today, not tomorrow
Not bound up in yesterday
Just today.

Excitement around a Female PM

As the week in Australian politics has unfolded, I've watched people around me be excited about the first female PM in Australia, whatever they think of how it came about.  I'm not unhappy about it - but the whole issue of women being in significant roles just doesn't fill me with excitement.  And that has had me pondering - why is that?  Alongside that I have numerous people around me who are very conscious of these issues in many areas of society - so I have much reason to ponder why these issues are not overly present for me.

As I've pondered this week, I think it's due to a strong belief that women can and will be in those roles and a sense of taking it for granted, even though it's physically never happened before.  There is a sense in me of "of course, what's the big deal".

I do see that these issues are real in our society but there is a very real sense that they are not overly present for me ... thanks to all sorts of things in who I am and my upbringing.

Transitions

Transitions.  Interesting times.  When we go through transitions, it's not just us going through them.  They impact those around us.  They impact our relationships.  They impact our inner world.  They impact our time.  They impact our energy.  They impact all around us.  We are indeed interconnected individuals and each of our decisions impacts each other.  If we do this, than we can't do that.  If we do this, we won't want to do that.  We often don't know the full impact of a transition until we are in it, or perhaps even after that season.  We might be able to guess, others might be able to guess but it's only in the midst of it and in reflection on it that we can know it's real impact.

I'm very much enjoying my current transition - but I'm very conscious of the transition it is for others as well as me.

Oh Where are You Going?

Recently, I was in a church service and we sang this song from the
Iona Commununity. The words really struck me:

1. Oh where are you going,
and can I come with you,
and why is your company
never the same?
You sit among beggars,
you argue with bankers,
debate with the lawyers
and walk with the lame.

2. Oh where are you going,
and can I come with you,
and what is your secret
towards which you strive?
What hidden inspirer,
what unseen admirer,
what dream is the substance
upon which you thrive?

3. I'm going on a journey
and welcome companions,
but don't ask me how we'll
survive, where we'll go,
or who will come with us,
or what we'll be doing.
Just join me in travelling
and learn all I know.

People you are around ...

This post is interesting - about the way the people you are around shape you.

What do you think about this?
If you listened to it, what would you change?

I missed the link to it on Dave's blog but another friend saw it.  Her reflection was "how might this shape what faith community we are around?"  Very good question, I reckon about that and many other things.

Every Day

I am regularly thankful for the formation of my teenage years.  Below is one of the things that was in our church newsletter approx. 20 years ago that at various times has been on the wall of my bedroom or office. I was prompted to go find it tonight by a tweet by Bryan ... about a post that John Piper had written.

Reflections from Psalm 104

1.  Every day, I will look into the sky and see the miracle of God.
2.  Every day, I will open my eyes and ears to see mystery ... in a person, a flower, a cloud or a tiny and apparently little creature.
3.  Every day, I will not tolerate the current idea of mindless and endless revolutionary process.
4.  Every day, I will treat as a special gift from God, to be lived for Him.
5.  Every day, I will determine not to believe that this day is merely another ambiguous and plodding 24 hours, but rather a meeting with God in everything I do, and everything that happens to me.
6.  Every day, I will not demean my own uniqueness by envying others.
7.  Every day, I will ask for and receive a new cleansing that God graciously offers in His Son.

Warn me someone!

Would someone please warn me next time I start praying this prayer regularly that God's taken me on an interesting journey the last two times I've done that.  Yet again this prayer makes it onto this blog!  Thanks Thomas Merton!

My Lord God
I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that I think I am following your will
does not mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please does in fact please you.
And I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road
though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost
and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for you are ever with me,
and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

Spiritual Needs?

Some people I'm around have been talking in terms of people's spiritual needs.  I have been uncomfortable about these words - for some reasons that I have been able to touch into and some that I haven't.  The ones I have been able to touch into have mostly been personality driven but I knew that there was more to it than that.  So I've sat with it.

Today, while thinking about a tweet that I read the other day which I was also uncomfortable with about "God help us for the fact that people go to different churches or ministries according to what they need", some of my thoughts clarified.

I am very comfortable with people being involved in the process of giving and receiving in various contexts - I don't think the Bible in any way indicates something about "you must be part of one spiritual community".  I do think that it's important that we live in true spiritual community - but that can be in many contexts.  We are as likely to not be living in ways that allow others in as part of one community as we are living in relationships of authenticity, honesty, openness and growth in whatever contexts we find ourselves - Christian and otherwise.  It's much more about our attitude than it is about whether we have "a" spiritual community.  We are not an island, others do have a right and responsibility in the context of relationship to speak into our lives and we have a responsibility to hear and evaluate their words and their wisdom before God with openness, humility and critique and make changes based on those evaluations.  We need to live with others in such relationships as to make that possible (now there's the challenge!).

So, given that, how do we choose what contexts we are in?  This is where I agree with the tweet - I don't think it's based on our "needs", if our "needs" is simply "wants going to give me the connection with God I need" or something like that.  That's what I am uncomfortable with in the wording in the first situation I outlined.  Firstly, I think the question is "what context/s is God inviting me to be in - right now, today, for this season?"  Sometimes we have a clear sense of that - and in our own discernment aided by those around us, we need to go with it even if it doesn't make "sense".  Sometimes, to help us answer that question we need to ask some other questions.  I think the real questions are not what are my "needs" but rather something along the lines of "what context/s would it be helpful for me to be in to empower my being in the world in ways where I 'live freely animated and motivated by God's spirit'?"  Here the focus is not on me and my needs (which I think is dangerous in a consumer culture) but rather on God and God's world and our place in it.

To be honest, I think some of the issues that I'm uncomfortable with are somewhat ones of semantics in this case (ie. I think the people using the words would be on somewhat of the same page as me).  However, they are semantics which matter to me.  In a culture which all the time teaches me to consume, I don't want to be reinforced in this consumer mentality which puts me at the centre in my engagement with spirituality.  I want the way I think about all the contexts in my life - spiritual community and otherwise - to keep reinforcing a perspective which places God and God's agenda and ways at the centre and it being from that place that I make decisions about the contexts in which I engage in.  I want to form others in ways that reinforce those things.

I guess the words matter to me because they form me and others deeply.

Great Saints, Great Sinners

Great Saints, Great Sinners


Richard Rohr

Sin and grace are related. In a certain sense the only way we really understand salvation, grace, and freedom, is by understanding their opposites. That's why the great saints are, invariably, converted sinners. When you finally have to eat and taste your own hard-heartedness, your own emptiness, selfishness and all the rest, then you open up to grace. That is the pattern in all our lives. That's why it was such a grace in my hermitage year when I was able, at last---even as a male and a German---to weep over my sins and to feel tremendous sadness at my own silliness and stupidity. I think all of us have to confront ourselves as poor people in that way. And that's why many of our greatest moments of grace follow upon, sometimes, our greatest sins. We are hard-hearted and closed-minded for years, then comes the moment of vulnerability and mercy. We break down and break through. Source: Letting Go: A Spirituality of Subtraction via inward/outward.

Being Busy

"Being busy is a form of laziness : lazy thinking and indiscriminate action. Being overwhelmed is as unproductive as doing nothing, and far more unpleasant. Being selective - doing less - is the path of the productive. Focus on the important few, and ...ignore the rest. Lack of time is actually a lack of priorities." From Derek Sivers' website, notes on Tim Ferris' book

Enneagram Twos

Twos learned two things growing up: to put other people's needs ahead of their own, and that they must give in order to get. Twos feel that if they take care of others, others will take care of them. (The Power of the Enneagram audio tapes)

Poverty in the West

Love this quote :

“The greatest disease in the West today is not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases with medicine, but the only cure for loneliness, despair, and hopelessness is love. There are many in the world who are dying for a piece of bread but there are many more dying for a little love. The poverty in the West is a different kind of poverty — it is not only a poverty of loneliness but also of spirituality. There’s a hunger for love, as there is a hunger for God.”

-Mother Teresa

Megalong Valley

The creek where we scattered Phil's ashes ...

Voices: The Carrical Project

The other night I went to a performance of Voice: The Carrical Project
as part of the Fringe Festival. It's a performance put on by Scotch
College, along with Servants in Hawthorn and supported by the City of
Booroondara. Carrical is a rooming house that is run by Servants in
Hawthorn, which has close connections with Hawthorn West Baptist
Church. The director of Voices has been connected with Hawthorn West
and Carrical for many, many years. This performance came about
through a coffee conversation between the person who ended up
directing Voices and the CEO of Servants in Hawthorn/Carrical. What
came about through that conversation was connection and conversations
between students of Scotch College and a performance telling the
stories of the residents of the rooming house. It was a great and
truthful honouring of their lives - including the life of someone who
recently died - and a project that achieved so much on so many levels.

A great dream becoming a great reality, coming out of the faithfulness
of a community to this work over many years.

Are we willing to give up?

Our hope for the future lies not so much in what we are able to give, but in what we are willing to give up; not in what we are able to do, but in our willingness to do without.

(Daniel Deffenbaugh, via Waving or Drowning? via Inward/Outward)

One of the joys of my day ... At Campion in Kew

Loving the Wilderness

While it's not my current place in my own journey (ie. I don't feel in a wilderness place), I do love and relate to this post about loving the spiritual wilderness.

Others Doing the Promoting for You

During the week I read this post by Seth Godin.

It made me think about the work that we are doing in our local area.  We have more children and families in our drop in space for families everyday than really is comfortable.  This comes from really starting this space operating like this in October last year - not long at all.

It was after a long process of presence, prayer and discernment and a commitment to the building and our actions being for the use of the local community.

Regularly, we have people coming in because they have heard about it from someone we don't know.

One my co-workers in all this wrote this in response to reading Seth's post - it is so true and most excellent:
People in the first circle aren't interested in telling others about the thing we are doing, they want to share the place where they, their children and their friends belong. 

Thomas Merton Prayer

In another season of my life this prayer by Thomas Merton was of great importance.  At that time I re-wrote it with the specific work God was doing in me at the time.  It was interesting and timely to read it this week on this blog.  I plan to also start the discipline of praying it daily.

My Lord God
I have no idea where I am going.
I do not see the road ahead of me.
I cannot know for certain where it will end.
Nor do I really know myself,
and the fact that I think I am following your will
does not mean that I am actually doing so.
But I believe that the desire to please does in fact please you.
And I hope that I have that desire in all that I am doing.
I hope that I will never do anything apart from that desire.
And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road
though I may know nothing about it.
Therefore I will trust you always though I may seem to be lost
and in the shadow of death.
I will not fear, for you are ever with me,
and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

Are we Objects to be Saved?

Thanks to Anj for this quote:

When people become objects to be saved, we lose sight that we are all created in the image of God and everybody loses.

Book: Ratio - The Simple Codes Behind the Craft of Everyday Cooking

An interesting post about a book:

http://cafedave.net/cafedave/archives/2009/09/book-ratio-the-simple-codes-behind-the-craft-of-everyday-cooking/

Thanks Dave - looks very interesting.

A couple of unsung heroes

A couple of my friends are away this weekend. They are a part of a
group of people who are committed (too soft and too strong a word at
the same time) to a particular local area and network as God allows it
to emerge. We're close but due to a range of factors have only had
passing conversations about many things in recent weeks. I knew
they were away with this "mob" this weekend and had pictured in my
mind 5 - 10 people away for a weekend. A few days ago I realised that
it was 20 people going away - this friend of this person, and this
other person who knows everyone through this; you get the drift. It's
a retreat with sessions of reading the Bible together and such things
- who knows how much some of these people have read the Bible before,
and I have no doubt that with this mob reading the Bible with them,
they'll come away excited about it and seeing it as a natural thing to
do. It'll be a messy, real weekend I'm sure. But one with much love,
fun, care and presence.

What's brought it all about? No question - God! Also no question (as
a subset of that): the "mob" concentrating on what God's up to in them
and trusting God to do his job of building the kingdom; being present
in the miriad of places that they find themselves each day and open to
who and what they find there; being expectant that God is working for
the kingdom and watching for opportunities to join him in it; not
needing "it" to be anything and so letting what will emerge happen;
being real in the mix of the real messiness of life. These are just a
few of the things that I think contributes to the miracle of what it
happening.

I love that I get to journey with these guys and that we get to shape
one another in our journeys as God continues to do his work in and
around us.

Coffee Break Prayer

Coffee and Barb - not a theme at all!!!

I like the idea of this (http://childrensministerblog.com/?p=32)
- I'd probably change some of the specifics - I wonder what might work
for you?

I love the idea of the time, of using the segments of a coffee break
to prompt different things, of using the "aroma" idea, of the time
slot being a possible thing for most people to do, of the possibility
of doing it alone or with others.

If you use it, do feedback on here how you work with it and how it goes.

Increased Posting

As you will have noticed, I've posted a few things over the last
couple of days - expect it to continue!

For a long time, I've felt the invitation from within myself, as well
as, I think, an invitation from God to post more. To post more of my
thoughts, to post more links to other blogs I'm reading, to post more
about the things I'm giving my life to. There have been many reasons,
good and not so good, that I haven't followed this invitation - but I
plan to change that now. So expect an increase in blogging - of all
kinds.

I'm in an incredibly rich time. Much is happening in and around me.
Much of this I won't choose to blog directly around - for my own
privacy, the privacy of those around me or the confidential nature of
the issues. The thinking and some of the experiences that these
situations bring about however will of course be discussed. I'm happy
to discuss much of the specifics of the issues with people as is
appropriate in off line or one-one forums - so do feel free to ask
more if you'd like; I just think it's wiser to be careful in the
public context of a blog. If you are closer to the situations in my
life - be careful what you assume I'm talking about, there are so many
things going on around me in my own life and the lives of those I'm
connected to, it would be wise to not draw conclusions - there's your
warning!

That leads to a couple of the reasons that I've hesitated blogging and
some of the reasons I'm now changing that. One of them is exactly the
issue I've just written about - people assuming they know what I'm
writing about (and they may or may not be accurate) or the difficulty
in knowing the appropriate level to blog at. One of my other
hesitations has been around feeling nervous around being public around
my thoughts in a whole range of areas. A whole range of things that
have been bubbling away in me for a long time, along with both some
conversations of this past week, as well as just the "energy" to do
it, has encouraged me to change that. The quote in the previous post
about boldness and humility links in well.

All who are thirsty

A great post about coming to Jesus with all our thirsts - our healthy ones and not so healthy:

http://godspace.wordpress.com/2009/09/04/thirsting-for-coffee-with-god-a-very-spiritual-practice/

(I write this as I sit drinking my morning coffee - love the irony!)

Loved lots of things about the post but one paragraph I love especially follows from talking of how Jesus doesn't take the disciples away after saying that if you are thirsty come to me.  It speaks deeply of many things in my current place.  Here is the next paragraph:

"While this frustrates me, it's also true that these open ended statements are part of what makes the Bible live for every generation. Because everything's not spelled out, we need to wrestle with it, pray about it, talk about it, contextualize it, and hold our answers with enough boldness to explain why believe them, and enough humility to discard them when more light shines on our convictions and shows us we need to shift."

Do you love people or things?

A person who I used to work with and a good co-journeyer reminded me
of this quote the other day - not sure where it comes from:

"There are people who love people and use things and there are people
who love things and use people."
(things can be anything - not just tangible things: might be a dream,
might be money, might be a building, might be an organisation)

I pray to be a person who deeply loves people and uses things of all
kinds.

Post about Confession and Guilt

a great post about Confession and Guilt:

http://julieclawson.com/2009/09/03/confession-and-guilt/

Precious Moments

I have had so many precious moments over the last few months, like all moments these are never to be repeated ... and some of them have been shared with someone who I will never share moments with again.

The moments that I had with Phil between 16th May and 9th June were some of the most precious of my life.  One of the nurses came into my workplace this week when I wasn't there and spoke with a workmate/friend about how fast it was - certainly was that.  I remember distinctly speaking with someone an hour after the phone call and sensing the specialness of what I was doing at that point - and that was before I really knew what the following week and month would bring.  It was a special to be trusted at the level I was by someone who didn't trust easily.  To have moments of connection around emotions of being scared and of frustration.  To walk the journey of coming to terms with illness and death.  The sharing the moment of going into an unconscious state for the last time. Words don't come anywhere close to expressing the specialness of all that month was.  

Precious, important, special, a gift - those are some of the words that speak of some of those moments with Phil during that month.  

Moments - they are all we have - each one special and a gift, every one of them.

Scared

I had a great night talking with some friends and co-journeyers about some of our dreams.  Tonight we were mostly focused on one of the others dreams - she was in the "hot seat", being the person where the most pressure is on for her next steps.  It was a precious conversation where we were all being truly ourselves and speaking meaningfully and deeply.  We were able to speak truth into my friends dream.  Truth that rang true, but truth that was the hardest things we could have said.  We spoke about how to be really true to who we are and what we are uniquely made for is the most scariest thing we can do in our lives because it is in fact exactly that - facing and owning who we are at our core.  The most freeing thing, yet the thing so many of us avoid so skillfully.  Having spoken about that, we also spoke about the reality that if we are not prepared to face ourselves honestly then we are also not able to cope often with others facing themselves honestly.  As well as some tangible outcomes for our friend, we came away continuing to be encouraged to live true.  We also came away having deeply experienced church.

Thirsty

It's amazing - sometimes you don't know that you are so desperately thirsty until the thirst is quenched.

Grief

A little while ago someone semi jokingly commented on the fact that I should write a book about Grief and Loss - I've certainly experienced enough of it in my life.  As I sit in an ideal situation, overlooking the ocean with indeed blue sky all around me, I ponder grief.

Today, I am deeply thankful for grief.  Grief aligns my priorities.  Grief forces me to do the work of deep knowing of self.  It forces me to understand myself as truly alone in the world.  Grief treats people as that of deep importance.  Grief forces deep honesty.  Grief is precious - it can't be manufactured - it is what it is.

Grief is also exhausting and alienating.  It won't allow your defences to get in it's way.  It refuses to give it's gifts without the recipient enduring the pain.  It is no respecter of things that need to happen or how the person wants to present.  It comes as it wishes, to do its wish.

I am very aware that you either go with grief, or you pay the cost in many, many ways.  I'd prefer to go with it.  Grief continues to make me the person I am today.  As I think through the last 10 years of my life, or even 15 years really, I can name deep grief at many points.  The work grief has worked in me, and continues to deeply work in me, I am immensely thankful for.  

What are we on about?

The source of life is God - that is a truth that I know deeply.

Various things recently have had me pondering what is important in the ministry that I engage in.  What is the point?  For me, there is deep meaning in helping people experience wholeness in life in any way - I want to help the world be a place where people are loved and experience more wholeness in all sorts of ways.  The faith expressions that I grew up with were not, in my opinion, focused enough on this - ie. what I would now call creation theology and the call of God to be involved in the work of his kingdom for all people / all of creation.  More recently I have been around contexts and theology that has very much been on about this - and I'm thankful for that.

However, for me, this involvement stems from a deep knowledge of the love, embrace and forgiveness of God, from a deep relationship with my creator, redeemer and sustainer.  Often I feel that in some of the contexts that I and some of my friends are around, we lose sight of some of the other parts of the spectrum - what does it mean to encourage others into a deeper relationship with the one who brings true wholeness, the one who is indeed the creator, but who is also redeemer and sustainer.  I want to encourage myself and those around me to continue to look to this one alone for life - it's only in Him that I believe life in all it's fullness is found, it's only in Him that we have the power to live the life He has invited us into.

Story

A few things over the last few days have prompted me to think about story.  I've been watching the movie "Australia" over the last few days and the phrase "all we really have is our story" hit me.  It's so true - and how precious is each of our story.  What would it mean for us to live into our story more? Embrace our story more?

Your focus

Great quote via this blog:

"The more you focus on something -- whether that's math or auto racing or football or God -- the more that becomes your reality, the more it becomes written into the neural connections of your brain."

-Andrew Newburg, neuroscientist

The last minutes and hours of life

Having spent much time beside the bed of a very unwell person recently and many hours in a couple of hospitals, I've had some time for reflection.  I've also had lots of times of really being present in the moment - I'm so glad I am able to be that now.

As I sat with my uncle just hours before he died - between when he was last conscious and when we finally died, I found myself using one of the many resources that are deep within me - it was some words from Julien of Norwich "All is well, all shall be well and all manner of things shall be well".  I found myself saying it repeatedly in time with my uncles breathing.

On reflection, I remembered another story of someone with a person close to them in the last minutes before they died - praying the Lord's prayer.

These combined experiences have made me ponder - what is it like at these times without deep spiritual resources of some kind that are beyond the cerebral?

Freshly engaging with the Bible

As we were organising a funeral for a close family member recently, I had the delight of watching someone engage with the Bible in a way that was fresh, interested and found meaning.  As the minister gave her a Bible and opened it to a passage he thought might be a good place to start, she said "no I don't like that" and then looked across the page and noticed another bit and went "what about this, it's so perfect for him; can I start anywhere and finish anywhere; what are these numbers, are they phrases?"  It was great watching someone engage and feel like they could find meaning in a book that they obviously have rarely engaged with, at least for themselves.

Everything changes in a second

A phone call at 11am.
At 9pm board a flight from Melbourne to Darwin.

A full week planned,
Everything is cancelled or covered.

A weekend in Daylesford,
changed to a week (or so) in Darwin.

Things that really matter,
Suddenly are in perspective.

Amazement happens at the thought of preparation,
Of life working together towards this moment.

God is known deeply,
Shock is real.

Aloneness feels good and precious mostly,
with moments of longing for others.

Don't know what moments the days ahead will bring,
But comfort in the preciousness of each moment.

In a second, a conversation, a moment,
life changes.

Testing

I am testing posting via email.

Quotes from Rohr

I love these quotes from Richard Rohr:

“Everything circles around what you do with your pain. If you don’t transform it, you’ll transmit it.” 

and

“Without an encounter of real transformation, idolatry is inevitable.” 

which was on this blog.

More Time?

I like this post by Seth Goddin.

Why not make that decision rather than waiting - more time will probably only create anxiety not a better decision.

Why should you run something?

Over the last while, I've been think about the question around how you decide to run a "program", group or event and I have been shifting in my thoughts.

I, and many in the faith community network I'm part of, have come from environments where from good motivations at the core, there has been lots of pressure for people to be involved and run Sunday school, youth group, be on committees etc but where that often means people doing things from a sense of guilt or duty.

Moving away from that (and towards other things), we have considered it much more important for people to do things because they have a need for it (and invite others into that) or to have a passion for it.  So if no one feels the energy for something then it doesn't happen.  I have been a supporter and promoter of that.

I'm not sure about it anymore - probably more accurately, I am moving from that place.  I don't think that is the path of discipleship.  I am moving more to thinking what's appropriate to ask the questions of "what is needed in this setting" and "what can I offer / what is God calling me to offer".  The key difference in this is the focus on others not the focus on self.  I know so deeply that it's in giving our lives that we find our lives (rather than in looking for our own lives) and I think that what we/I have been living in for a while actually is something that is a different path to that.  I don't think now that it's the path of discipleship.  I certainly don't think it's the path of the cross and resurrection - the path of life.

Thankfully, God works through all sorts of things and I've seen much fruit of the perspective I have had / been leading in but for me it has assumed that the foundations are missional and outward looking and more and more I realise that is an unfair expectation for most people.  It's hard to be discovering that you disagree with some key perspectives you and others around you have lived in.

Proximity

I'm discovering that proximity is an important reality for me.  It can be proximity in many ways - geographical, relational, technological, mutual goals, contact; somehow "closeness" is important, whatever the form.  As I have thought about some people I've been equally committed to and what has fostered the development of one relationship and our relating and what has hindered another - proximity has been what I've begun to explore as the distinguishing factor.  The more the levels of proximity overlap, the greater the room for the growth of friendship, mutuality, the knowingness and being known and presence in each others lives.  This means that I share life more with some people in other countries who are also technologically connected than I do with some people who I dearly like to who live in the next suburb.  It also seems for me that proximity produces proximity (I am more likely to initiate relating with people who are proximate than the one who is not proximate).  

The realisation of this in the last 24 hours has freed me not only in the particular context I was reflecting on but others where the reality of life just does mean we are not in proximity.  Doesn't mean I care any less but given what I'm discovering about myself (probably in some degree everyone) it is the reality that governs who and what I am going to give myself to.  

It's also helpful to reflect on because it does seem that it means that I'm increasingly focused on the present - which is a marked and very healthy shift for someone who has spent alot of time holding onto the past.

The current moment is all we have and it is precious.

Fairness

I have been reading lots recently and have been really refreshed and empowered by it.  I have recently read a book called "The Social Entrepreneur" by Andrew Mawson.  It's a great book.  There are lots of things that I have been led to think about and do coming out of reading it but one thing that has really impacted me is his take on fairness.  I'm not sure if it's a quote or not but there is certainly a sense that the concept of fairness hinders innovation.  Intrinsically many of us value fairness; we have been brought up understanding that it's an ideal principle.  But where do we get that from and is it actually what creates the best society or even does it work?  As I ponder this, I've been thinking about it in all sorts of contexts: two three yr old friends of mine are regularly heard saying "but that's not fair" (I'm sure you can all imagine that well!); the concept of fairness hinders freedom as I think about who I am in different relationships - if I concentrate on fairness across relationships I actually can't really give myself in a real, mutual and present way to any relationship; as I think about conversations about the future direction of the community space/church building I'm involved in reshaping the concept of fairness can threaten to stiffle forward movement so much so that in wanting to be fair to all we would not really do anything well for anyone; is God 'fair'? increasingly I think not!

Removing 'fairness' as a value allows great freedom and treatment of people much more as people and less as objects, it allows from the heart responses, it allows us to make a difference in the corners of the world where we can, are present in and have passion for which has to be better for everyone in the long term. 

Farewell 'fairness'!

Stress

An interesting experience today.  I have been feeling very relaxed - in fact I described to someone today that I'm the most relaxed I have been in years.  An email this afternoon about a work thing that is undone (on the list of many things to do) made my stress level go up immediately - wasn't even a tense email ... but a forward of someone else asking for something.

It was interesting to note just how quickly it changed my state and over how small a thing.  I'm actually thankful for it as it was something I could observe in a way I often can't ... and i was also able to go "I'm on leave - you don't need to worry about that now".  Still I'm struggling to let it go ... and pondering how much of that kind of stress there is in my life on a day to day basis.

But for now - back to leave!

Testing

Just testing whether I can see posts in NetNewsWire.

We are Adopted

Recently, for various reasons, I've been thinking a bit about foster care and whether all people around a family with a child who is currently fostered treat that family as a "real" family.  A week or so ago, with this in my mind, I was preparing for Christmas and read John 1.  To those who believed in the Light he gave the right to be children of God: we are adopted into his family, we are IN his family.  How often do we treat ourselves and act is if we are only "half" in God's family.  How often do we try and "live in both worlds"?  We are adopted - with all the rights and responsibilities that means.  A friend and I both had tears in our eyes as we thought afresh about the depth of what that means.

Great post coming from an article by Rowan Williams

Having just spent significant time deciding whether to stay in the process of Anglican ordination - and deciding to, it is of great encouragement and comfort to read these words spoken by the Archsbishop of Canterbury which echoes something of my sentiments in my last post.  He discusses it as bringing true evangelical and catholic together.

Check ti out here.

Caught in the Middle

So often I feel caught in the middle of lots of things.  It's not that I don't have opinions, I do have them - and quite firm ones at that, but often I can see both sides and agree with parts of both sides, so often end up in the middle - the "middle way" as it is often called (the "middle way" is one of the things that defines Anglicanism - seems like I am in the right denomination!).  

Tonight a conversation with a staff member after a great group conversation about SPACE once again made me conscious of the way in which I am in the middle.  Sparked by some things she said in the group conversation and some other things, we talked through her sense of the only reason to be doing what we are doing is evangelism.  For her that means people being converted.  I'm conscious of how different that is to what matters to many I'm around, in word and action - and how I am in the middle.  What matters to me is that people experience wholeness and for me that wholeness comes in all sorts of forms but only finds it's fulfillment in knowing Jesus and growing in relationship and discipleship of him.  Through the conversation tonight my sense that I am wanting more people with a relationship with Jesus, who long for people to know and experience wholeness in it's completeness, to be in SPACE regularly has been reinforced.

And the conversation with the staff member after this group conversation led me to understand some more of why that is difficult for many around me.  Not only are we time and energy committed in many (good) places - many of the people around me are not sure where they are in their own relationship with God, are not sure about the uniqueness of Jesus, are not experiencing the transformation that they once believed was the experience they would receive from relationship with Jesus, are not growing in their relationship with God ... and at the bottom of it, their confidence in Jesus is low and therefore, they are not confident in what to share about the life that he offers.  Therefore, people come down to being interested in doing good in the world, offering good things to the world.

I am convinced that this in itself, while being good, is just touching the surface of the issue.  It's like giving people a drink of life giving water, but not helping them to knowing where to find the life giving water which will never try up.  They might have a heap of water (good in their life that they might even be able to share with others) but if they are not in a deep connection with the One who is the creator then life in its fullness is not known and shared.  This is what I long for - people to know life in its fullness and to this end the staff members comment tonight is accurate - "what's the point otherwise?"

He is Enough

Blessed are those who mourn for they will be comforted.

Blessed am I who have mourned for I have been comforted.

Through entering into mourning, I have received comfort,

And that comfort is way enough; He is enough.

So can I trust to enter into mourning in other things?

Can I trust that he will hold me?  Can I trust that I will be comforted?

It is only in entering into mourning, that I will receive comfort,

And that comfort is way enough; He is enough.

Anger

Tonight I am angry.  I am angry at a number of things - one of them is the way people in all sorts of areas of life keep knowledge to themselves - and teach something they know to not be the only voice.  It's not just that people speak what people can understand - it's often that people speak what they know to be much more questioned than they teach.  One of the values is some of the children's ministry context I've led within is "Don't teach children things that they will need to unlearn later".  I think this is a good principle for life: by all means speak in a language and method that the people you are speaking to can comprehend and apply but don't teach as "the only understanding" things you know to have many more options behind them.  All sorts of fields do this - right now my anger is directed towards people who have studied theology and, in particular, Paul's letters and the "New Perspective" on Paul and who continue to teach a Lutheran understanding to the Law and righteousness even though they know that there are many more views and scholarship around.  

And by the way - yes I did have an exam today - on Romans!  Any guesses what I've been spending much time on over recent days!!!!

Sparkling

I went out for a dinner with a close friend of mine the other night and decided to try some sparkling white for a change.  And I really enjoyed it.  Like it seems with too many things, I like it if it's good quality!

Just maybe ...

My thoughts on Anglicanism and whether I will make it through what is often called the "sausage machine" that is the training of Anglican Ordination candidates goes up and down.  As someone who knows a fair amount about where the system is up to here in Melbourne said to me today and someone else also in the know said to me a little while ago: "You are five years too early".  Often I wonder if there is room for me and people like me in the Anglican system, and in particular in the ordination and immediately post ordination/curacy system.  I often think not.  A conversation I had today encouraged me that just maybe I will make it!  Time shall tell.

Presencing

A book I read a number of years ago called "Presence" is becoming a lived experience for me.  Amazing experiences of "letting go" and "letting come" are happening as I live my personal life, as I personally engage with issues in my work life and as I work with others on these issues.  We have no idea what the future that seeks to emerge will look like ... but we feel that we are starting to understand something about the conversations and moments that need to happen for us to be at a point to be transformed personally and corporately so that we can let the coming future emerge and embrace it.  

Here is a diagramatic representation of the process as discussed within "Presence".

Are you who you would love to be?

For various reasons I have been thinking alot about the gap between who we are and who we'd like to be.  Around our faith community, a number of us for many years have loved the expression "mind the gap" and just recently I've had another experience of pondering this and knowing the reality of it in my life.  How often do we really want to be able to be and act a particular way but find ourselves incapable of doing that exact thing.  My most recent experience of this has interestingly been one of acceptance of this reality in a way that it never has been before - still a longing for more and to be different but not a negative experience, certainly one of peace and acceptance, though not contentment (I don't think I want contentment with it).  I think it's only peace and contentment with the reality that then enables honesty about what's going on and the ability to work with reality as it is rather than as you'd want it to be.  This experience has also caused me to reflect on experiences of my life where others would dearly love to have been able to choose to be and act differently than what they were capable of - it's certainly continued to grow my compassion and realism about life.  It's all been quite interesting at the same time as studying Romans 7 where Paul talks about "finding this law at work, when I want to do good is evil is right there with me" and writing an essay on Romans 8 (18-30) about how everything works for (what I reckon is) our maturity as people who are on about what we were created for.  Also interesting at a time where myself and some close friends are having experiences of deep freedom in some areas of our life in ways we are so thankful for ... and can only say that it's the mystery of God's grace that has brought it about.  But yet we live in a time and place in history where we have good reason to hope for transformation and live in a way that opens the path for that, but that needs to accept reality as such that we are still on that journey.  And the journey is good and rich.

Advent Calendars

Last year in early November we had a time at one of our faith community gatherings thinking through how families especially might explore Christmas together.  It inspired me to do an Advent Calendar for my friends who are twins and who last year at Christmas were almost 2.  It was fun and they enjoyed it.  I also gave the content to a few others.  

This year I have revised that a little, keeping it aimed at preschoolers, and I've written an adults version with the same daily themes so that parents have some prompts for thoughts and actions along the same themes that they are working with their children on.  I'm working on giving a "kit" of these to all families who are part of our faith community plus some other important families in my life.   It includes things like candles to light each day, a chocolate or other treat appropriate in that family advent calendar, a card for each day with a theme and an activity for that day.

Let me know if you'd like a copy of the parts of this that have soft copies.

(Solace families - you will get one and will be asked soon about your preference about a few things that are in it so that what you receive is appropriate for your family/children ... but still let me know if you'd like a soft copy to be able to give it beyond your family)

Some other things I've come across that some adults might be interested in for Advent reading and action are two books: one by Marcus Borg and John Dominic Crossan called "The First Christmas" and another is "Advent and Christmas: Wisdom for G.K. Chesterton" - by the Center for the Study of C.S. Lewis and Friends.

Limiting Communications

I'm in another of my reading zones and currently I'm reading "Here Comes Everybody - The Power of Organising without Organisations" by Clay Skirky.  I thought this quote from page 42 was interesting and telling: "If you have ever wondered why so much of what workers in large organisations know is shielded from the CEO and vice president, wonder no longer: the idea of limiting communications, so that they flow only from one layer of the hierarchy to the next, was part of the very design of the system at the dawn of managerial culture".

Which thing to write about!

There is so much going on within and around me that I don't know which of the many things to write about.  So much growth, so much thought, so much being.  Life is good, God is good, I am satisfied.

Definition of Spirituality

We were sitting around at our regular coffee catch up time for staff around our network and discussing a range of things regarding spirituality. At one point, one of the people who is fairly disparaging of the word "spirituality" asked us all what we meant by the term. We went around and shared ... it's an interesting question. Most answers were something around "connection with 'the other'". The thing I added to that was that it was about "being" - with ourselves, God ('the other') and each other. I think for me at the moment it's something like "the mystery of deep connection with 'the other' which allows a 'being' with ourselves, God, each other and the world as it is in reality".

As I think about what I said in that conversation and a conversation over dinner last night when someone asked me about the Alexander Technique lessons I've been having all year - I recognise that "being" is the word of the year for me. It's an active "Being" - but it's not "doing" - it's a mystery that is hard to put words to but I know that I'm deeply growing in. It's a different way of living. It's one of being fully present in reality - physically, emotionally, spiritually. It's full of life and possibilies. It recognises limits and even chooses to limit itself further for the sake of growth and life.

Anyway - what's your definition of 'spirituality'? For those of you more "in church circles" - how would you define what the word means to you to someone "not of a Christian faith"?

Solace Dinner

Last night was a Spring Feast with the faith community network which I'm a part of. It was a lovely night - great food, great atmosphere, even greater people and a really special sense of understanding something deep about the mystery of life together, spoken about a bit but just "known". It was a time of celebrating a number of the dreams of people in our networks who are or have been involved in the journey of something that we reckon delights God. Thanks to another network who have gifted us with some money - this celebration included a gift of money to use in some way towards the dream. We celebrated things at all stages of the dream cycle - including things that have "failed". I love that! What we are wanting to celebrate is people's joining with God in the world - not the "outcome" of that (although we do want to celebrate when we can see the differences in a positive direction to). We recognise that "failure" is inevitable and shapes for the next step in the journey. But in essence it's also people's joining with him in his heart for the world that delights God - so that's also what we want to celebrate. It was a great night of being, celebration and presence, where God was gently but strongly honoured.

Mission - Families and/or Marginalised

It seems that I am having many conversations at the moment around some decisions we have made in my work/faith community context about our mission focus being families and children (and therefore our buildings being focused on families and children). The issues in the questions are complex - and to be frank, while it's tiring, it's raising the kind of conversations, questions and issues that we ought to be having more frequently!!!

Some of the conversations remind me of the first year or so of our faith community in 2000/2001 when I was doing Forge and also when myself and many peers really were thinking alot around issues of "priority for the poor". Our faith community at the time met in a strongly upper middle class area of Melbourne and I remember numerous supervision conversations around "what does incarnational ministry look like in upper middle class Melbourne"? Should we be doing it? Does God call us to have a priority for the poor? Given where I was in those conversations, I find it ironic (but very like God!) that I'm one of the main advocates that we should be basing our mission focus and therefore buildings on the main growing demographic of our area - families who materially are doing quite well. I've grown strongly in the direction of seeing it as important to "become all things to all people in order that we might save some" , or in my words - doing whatever it takes to connect with a people group in order that they might see the invitation to participate in the kingdom of God and join in on that. And we find ourselves in an area where a main growing demographic are families who are materially doing quite well. Alongside that, those of us who are committed to mission on the ground in a day-to-day way long term have a heart for those people, as well as abilities to connect with them and offer things that are needed for this group. We also find ourselves having a sense that this is the group who God has invited us to focus our efforts towards as we seek to be his followers in this place at this time.

Those of us doing this process have thought long and hard about this and wrestled with it, praying and fasting and spending much time thinking and discussing it. Not only is the question the general "priority for the poor" question but also currently our building is a space that much of the week a handful of local very marginalised people spend alot of time and where we are heading this will not be possible. There is another faith community that does a great job connecting with those marginalised people but they do it in a more "program" way rather than the "open space" way we have been doing. However, in reality it is 6 or so people and all of us who work on the ground regularly see clearly that these people cannot be in a space that families are going to be safe in without much supervision (and that's if the families are comfortable being around them - which certainly several local families have strongly indicated they are not).

So it's a bit of a predicament really and we have felt called to move ahead strongly with the single focus on the site we are talking about but haven't felt free to leave aside the question of how we continue relationship with those we currently have connection with and also I haven't felt free to assume that what we are currently doing will definately conclude (though thinking it will on the current site we are talking about).

Several of the wider community around these decisions (people from the faith communities who gather in the space) are currently questioning this focus. Some of it is from their personal perspective: where do I fit in this? I like the wide range of people currently at gatherings - will that continue if the site and building are focused on families and children? Absolutely fair enough questions. Another range of questions centre around: difference is a key of the gospel and also a key of our community, this goes against that. Yet another range of questions centre around: how can we not be focusing on the marginaised, especially how can we be creating a space where at least much of the time they would not be welcome, especially as a people of faith how can we do that. An extension of those questions centre around our responsibilities to those we currently have relationship with and who currently find themselves "at home" in the space we are discussing.
Great questions - I love that they are being asked and discussed and not easily left.

It's also an interesting journey for me personally - I find myself owning that I am more gifted than most in my abilities to minister with the marginalised, I find my passion for ministry with families and children coming to the fore once again, I find myself more strongly than ever believing in incarnational ministry - thinking that it's important to "become like" the people we are seeking to connect with, I find myself facing the realities of time, space, money and energy more than ever, I understand more than ever the need to make hard decisions, I find myself thinking it's important for us to stay in the struggle of what we think theologically, what the missiological needs and questions are and what we feel God's saying - and what it means to help others stay in the struggle.

And while spending hours thinking, discussing, praying and writing about those issues, I have been planning the next stage of the space becoming a "Family Wellbeing Centre" which starts on 1st October and planning timelines and project plans into next year.

And while doing that, doing the many things that our current and future ministry in this area requires. One of the things I love about things currently is the excitement that some staff have around what we are doing and being part of the vision - it's great to have such people working for us (I did semi hunt them down as people with the missiological ethos we need in the space at this time!!!!) I also love the stories daily of connections we have with people of all kinds, in the space and in the suburb; I love being part of the rhythms and relationships of this local community.

Great excitement and focus in the midst of struggle and questioning, that would be the title of my week!